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Seagull

Estoril
Joined
22 Aug 2005
Messages
3,657
Woman comes home and says to her husband, "I've got some good news for you and some bad news."

He says "Tell me the good news"

"The air bag works in your new Porsche!!!"

I know, the old ones are always the best, but someone told me this today and I still laughed (nervously)


Migration info. Legacy thread was 37363
 
Nice one Seagull - might be old but it's still good! How about this one....

A guy takes his kids to the zoo, but there were no animals there - only one single dog.

It was a sh*tzoo!


Migration info. Legacy thread was 37374
 
So you've not heard the one about the man who answers the door to a young lad, who is looking for odd jobs on the summer hols...

"Sure, mow the lawn, then strip the paint off the porch at the front of the house" he says, and off the young lad trots...

A few hours later, the young lad knocked on the door again.

"Finished, mister. One thing though... your car isn't a porch, its a Ferrari..."



I'll get my coat...


Migration info. Legacy thread was 37375
 
A blonde driving a Porsche sees another blonde with a Porsche that has broken down on the side of the road. She stops to ask what’s wrong.

The girl with the broken Porsche says, “I just had a look under the hood, and there’s nothing there. Somebody must’ve stolen the engine while I was driving!”

The first blonde says, “Oh, don’t worry, I have a spare in the back of my mine.”

<apologies to any blondes>


Migration info. Legacy thread was 37385
 
A 911 Turbo driver was going along a lane miles from anywhere when he saw a broken-down Reliant Robin and a downheartened looking old chap next to it. Feeling charitable, the Porsche owner stopped and offered the old gent in the Reliant a tow... "if I'm going too fast, or want to stop, then just flash your lights and toot your horn" he says to the old gent as he hooks up the tow rope.

Anyway, a few miles down the road, a Ferrari pulls out and roars past the towing pair. Unable to resist, the Porsche driver nails the throttle and gives chase....

Later that day, two country gents were having a pint at the village pub; one says to the other-

"you'll never guess what I saw today... I saw a Ferrari racing a Porsche down the lane past my farm. But the amazing thing was that there was Jeff in his 3-wheeler, close up behind the Porsche blowing his horn and flashing his lights to pass the both of them!"


Migration info. Legacy thread was 37387
 
:)

Migration info. Legacy thread was 37428
 

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