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asterix_the_gaul
Suzuka


Joined: 20 Dec 2008
Posts: 1047
Location: Cheshire

1999 Porsche 996 Carrera 2

PostPosted: Sun Sep 16, 2018 8:37 pm    Post subject: Science jokes Reply with quote

Have you guys heard that oxygen and magnesium are dating now?!!

I know...

😱 OMg
_________________
1992 944 S2 Cabriolet, Cobalt Blue/Classic grey -gone!
1995 993 C2 Cabriolet, Midnight Blue/Marble grey -gone!
1999 996 C2 Coupe, Ocean Blue/Graphite grey
2002 E46 M3 Cabriolet, Laguna seca blue/LSB
 
  
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asterix_the_gaul
Suzuka


Joined: 20 Dec 2008
Posts: 1047
Location: Cheshire

1999 Porsche 996 Carrera 2

PostPosted: Sun Sep 16, 2018 8:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

2 atoms walking down a street, one says to the other, I think I just lost an electron, the other one says: are you sure??

First one says Yes I'm positive..
_________________
1992 944 S2 Cabriolet, Cobalt Blue/Classic grey -gone!
1995 993 C2 Cabriolet, Midnight Blue/Marble grey -gone!
1999 996 C2 Coupe, Ocean Blue/Graphite grey
2002 E46 M3 Cabriolet, Laguna seca blue/LSB
 
  
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easternjets
Albert Park


Joined: 29 Apr 2016
Posts: 1673
Location: Darlington


PostPosted: Sun Sep 16, 2018 9:21 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I once told a joke about eye sight but nobody laughed as they said my jokes were just getting cornea and cornea!
_________________
997 Turbo Gen 2
997 Turbo Tiptronic S
Porsche 968 Coupe 1992
Porsche 928 S4
Porsche 911 3.2 Carrera 1985
 
  
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DrJimBone
Silverstone


Joined: 12 Oct 2017
Posts: 148
Location: Bournemouth


PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2018 10:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Heisenberg went for a drive and got stopped by a traffic cop. The cop asked, "Do you know how fast you were going?"

Heisenberg replied, "No, but I know where I am."

Embarassed sorry. Thumb
_________________
The trouble with the rat race is, even if you win, you are still a rat.
 
  
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MisterCorn
Long Beach


Joined: 08 Jan 2011
Posts: 6110
Location: Nottingham, England

2004 Porsche 996 Turbo

PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2018 11:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

There are 10 types of people in this world. Those who understand binary, and those who don't.

MC
 
  
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mikeluke
Barcelona


Joined: 03 Jun 2014
Posts: 1318
Location: Hampshire


PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2018 12:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a drink.
The bartender says, For you? No charge
_________________
Current:
981 Boxster S PDK
BMW X5 4.0d M Sport
VW Polo Match 1.2 2011 (the lad's)

Former:
996 Turbo S Cabrio Manual
996 Turbo Coupe Tip
968 Cabrio Manual
 
  
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asterix_the_gaul
Suzuka


Joined: 20 Dec 2008
Posts: 1047
Location: Cheshire

1999 Porsche 996 Carrera 2

PostPosted: Tue Sep 18, 2018 4:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

A psycho-analyst shows a patient an inkblot and asks him what he sees. The patient says: “A man and woman having sex.”

The psycho-analyst shows him a second inkblot, and the patient says: “That’s also a man and woman having sex.”

The psycho-analyst says: ah Ha! “You are obsessed with sex.”

The patient says: “What do you mean I’m obsessed? You’re the one with all the dirty pictures.”
_________________
1992 944 S2 Cabriolet, Cobalt Blue/Classic grey -gone!
1995 993 C2 Cabriolet, Midnight Blue/Marble grey -gone!
1999 996 C2 Coupe, Ocean Blue/Graphite grey
2002 E46 M3 Cabriolet, Laguna seca blue/LSB
 
  
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New997buyer
Yas Marina


Joined: 17 Oct 2010
Posts: 8668



PostPosted: Tue Sep 18, 2018 6:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

A dung beetle walks into a bar and says, “Excuse me, is this stool taken?”
_________________
“Forum signatures with quotes from famous people is a form of pretentiousness beyond compare.” Abraham Lincoln

997.1 turbo
Ex 996.2 turbo, 996.1 C2
 
  
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Millomboy
Suzuka


Joined: 10 Dec 2012
Posts: 1051
Location: Hampshire

1997 Porsche 993 Targa

PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2018 4:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

A couple of higgs boson walk into a catholic church. The priest says, 'sorry, you are not allowed in here'. The higgs boson reply 'think again, without us, you can't have mass'.
_________________
Ocean blue targa.
The only true freedom, is freedom from the heart's desires. And the only true happiness, this way lies.
 
  
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asterix_the_gaul
Suzuka


Joined: 20 Dec 2008
Posts: 1047
Location: Cheshire

1999 Porsche 996 Carrera 2

PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2018 7:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

a photon checks into a 5 star hotel, the bell boy asks if he can help the photon with his luggage, the photon says" no thanks, I'm travelling light..."
_________________
1992 944 S2 Cabriolet, Cobalt Blue/Classic grey -gone!
1995 993 C2 Cabriolet, Midnight Blue/Marble grey -gone!
1999 996 C2 Coupe, Ocean Blue/Graphite grey
2002 E46 M3 Cabriolet, Laguna seca blue/LSB
 
  
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MisterCorn
Long Beach


Joined: 08 Jan 2011
Posts: 6110
Location: Nottingham, England

2004 Porsche 996 Turbo

PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2018 7:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Not strictly a science joke, but... Why did lieutenant Uhura cry? Because Wlliam Shatner.

MC
 
  
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